In the past, I have had a disagreement with a cowroker during a staff meeting about a topic that affected the entire staff. While there was not much to the decision of the topic, for some reason, my coworker and I had a moment where our personalities clashed and was on display for the entire staff. Because of my personality, I essentially shut down because felt as though my opinion was being threatened yet I could not express my thoughts clearly. My coworker on the other hand has a stronger way with words and she continued to direct her words toward me through facing me while sitting and turning to me each time she spoke. The situation was very uncomfortable for everyone there and one other coworker even stepped in to try and help resolve the issue by asking us both specifically what we thought. This helped and allowed us to end the discussion however, the disagreement has never been addressed again by myself or my coworker.
From this experience as well as the information in our text this week, there are two strategies that may help me in the future if a conflict in communication arises again. First I would support the discussion by focusing on the issue. By allowing our personal opinions to overcome us, we were not making ground in the disagreement. There came a point where the disagreement too personal and was not focused on the topic which we were there for. The second strategy is to consider the importance of the outcome. This strategy may help to focus the discussion as well as to improve communication by following the philosophy that I tell parents all the time: "Pick your battles".
Hello Terri,
ReplyDeleteI agree with your strategies. Indeed, in a conflict situation, it is important for us to focus on the issue and not the person. Going on the attack should be a last resort in overcoming challenges. Rather than focusing on the person, we should try to see past them and figure out how to solve the problem.
Hi Terri - I have sat in on staff meetings where one person with a domineering personality would state her opinions with such passion that it would shut down the rest of the staff. Her passion was presented with such a confrontational tone that no one would dare state a different viewpoint. I think your strategies for handling future conflicts are much more productive than shutting down and avoidance. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteTerri,
ReplyDeleteConflict with a coworker is often a hard thing to deal with. Sometimes it takes you being the bigger person to move on from a disagreement especially a person that you work with because you are with them everyday. Being the bigger person may mean agreeing to disagree :)
Is is very hard when there is a situation with a coworker by itself, but when it is seen by others it is so much harder. I am dealing with a similar situation. The disagreement was not seen by others, but is known by others because of the results of our disagreement. It is hard, embarrassing, and not easy to overcome. Thank you for your post.
ReplyDelete